He loves his lawn, this man of mine – in the
summertime the lawn is always a big priority with him. He often speaks wistfully of mowing during the summer for his grandpa, who had an old-fashioned push mower with a reel. Back in the day that was all they had and he fondly remembers pushing
that thing back and forth, up and down, mowing the lawn.
Saturday morning is hunting time for me - I love
to go to estate sales with either my mom or my dearest friend, sometimes
with both of them. We poke through lost treasures and chat, get coffee
and just generally enjoy looking at stuff. Late Friday night I
realized I hadn't asked my friend to go to the sales in the morning and my mom
was already busy. I turned my weary eyes to my equally weary husband and
said, "Come with me tomorrow morning - we'll drive around with no
kids." I think it was the "no kids" part he was
hearing when he said, "Sure," and so we set the alarm clock for our morning journey.
When we were first married we spent most of our
free time driving. We had really no money and so driving around exploring
was something we did a lot of. That and early morning fishing, lots of
quiet time baiting hooks, listening, chatting. We learned a lot during
those times, mostly about each other. We laughed and talked and
just enjoyed being us.
What is that saying? That life gets in the
way...He is gone for work so much, we juggle kids schedules, me with two
part-time jobs. We are always coming and going. Sometimes we barely
get a chance to talk - we get home from work and jump right into the family
maelstrom of pick-ups and drop-offs, dinnertime, homework, dogs barking, dishes
in the sink. Falling into bed at the end of the day, each thinking of the
plan for the next day – what time
do I have to be up? Is tomorrow a workday, is my bag packed, do I have my
stuff together? Who has play practice or art class or cheerleading; notes
from school, lunch money; who is getting them to the bus?
This morning we set off to hunt for treasures, mapping out about a half-dozen sales for our drive. Almost immediately, 22 years vanished and suddenly we were right back where we
started - talking, listening, laughing. We were goofy, we were honest, we
were us. It was easy and natural and right. As we waited for one sale to open, he was
standing outside the truck. I sipped my coffee and looked at him standing
in the fresh powder of the falling snow - this man in his camouflage baseball
hat and comfortable clothes. I felt that familiar zing in my chest when he flashed his little cockeyed smile at me...He
is still so handsome and strong and I am so very lucky.
One of the last sales we were at was pretty small
- we walked through the house, looked at everything, and went back out the door.
Heading to the back of the yard, we
marveled at how this little house was set up much like our first
home, and into the garage we went.
My eyes swept the room and took in the saws on
the wall, the neat box of tools, the garden implements, and the
mower tucked under a shelf. Wait...a
push mower? With a reel? My head spun to him, he already had
his gaze locked on it. He had found his treasure, the mower like his
granddad's! It was pretty old, but it was in really good shape and he eagerly
said to the older man with the cash box, "It's perfect! My
son is going to love pushing this mower around the yard like I used to for my
grandpa!" There was some more excited chatter about hard work, grass
clippings, and lessons for kids, money changed hands, and we marveled at finding this treasure when we weren't even looking for it.
There is a lot of life in 22 years of marriage. Peaks and valleys, ups and
downs. You do have the good with the bad, just like they say.
And if you are lucky enough, strong enough, stubborn enough, one day you look
at each other and see that together you grew into something
you didn't know you needed. Something you didn't know was
possible and maybe you weren't even looking for it. You find yourself in a relationship that is as much a part
of you as the breath in your lungs.
I cannot imagine my life without this man by my
side. He is my treasure.
